Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
