I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
no. you can't hotbox the world.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
