can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Randomize