This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Randomize
