i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
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That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
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Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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