So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
