waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Actions speak louder than pants.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Randomize
