from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize
