I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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