We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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