I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
