k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
