is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
