Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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