We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
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You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
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So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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