He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
