They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
