i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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