I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
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