I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
