Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
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