HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
well, you know. whores of a feather.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize