I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
His nipple licking is glorious
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