Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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