No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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