I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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