Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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