he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
