Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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