She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
