Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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