Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
