Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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