She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
