i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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