Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
