just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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