You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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