I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize