i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Randomize
