It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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