This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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