Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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