im gay
i know
yea but for you.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
