What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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