Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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