It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
