There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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