It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize