He is an equal opportunity slut.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
