Whatcha textin bout Willis?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize