I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!