i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
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